That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.