the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
