So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
