I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
