don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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