my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
My balls are so social today.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
