I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
