Babe...You're really smothering me right now
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
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I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
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How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it