sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
These 23 People Had Sex With Someone From Completely Different Cultures
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
25 Medical Facts That Need To Be Common Knowledge
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.