I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Randomize
