as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Less talking, more tequila
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
