You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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