thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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