some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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