Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
