Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
