he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
