Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
