Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
