Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
