did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
