I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
