So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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