just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
