You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Randomize
