Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Randomize
