The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Boobs speak an international language.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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