Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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