Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Randomize
