We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
