TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
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You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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