fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
