And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
