Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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