What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
