Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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