I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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