I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
