I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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