So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
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