Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize