dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
