3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
