I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
