Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Randomize
