my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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