im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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