Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize