I don't remember. Are we still dating?
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
