Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
