Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
