u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Everyone says I win the strip club
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
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