at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
