Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Randomize
